Reach Your Child’s Heart using books
Have you ever found yourself trying to help your child grow in a certain area in their personal life and it seems that no matter how many times you say the words or how many different ways you say them, they are just not sinking in? Yeah, I’m sure you have because most of our children are different than us and sometimes, the approach we take is just not the way they relate. With four precious hearts that I have been entrusted with, I run into differences all the time. sometimes one needs space, and the other just needs me to sit and listen, and yet another may need me to explain it in detail again, but this tip is something I have been doing for several years and it has proven to be a great way to get to their hearts without sounding like a nagging mom, and that is through reading books! yep, thats it. BOOKS!
We may have been addressing a growth opportunity for quite a while now and it is seemingly going no where and this is where books are a great tool. I will find a book where the character is dealing with similar heart issues, sometimes these are easy to find and sometimes it takes a bit more effort, but our efforts are worthwhile.
Once we have selected the book, I casually ask them if they want to read a story [sometimes as a collective group and other times as a one-on-one]. I do not bring up why I chose that book, I simply start reading and pray that as I read, the Holy Spirit would speak to their hearts through the words.
As we read together, I begin asking gentle questions to help them process the story and be able to apply it rather than just listen to it third party
Some questions I may ask are:
What do you think The character is struggling with?
How do you think the character of the book hurt his friends?
What could the character have done differently?
What would’ve happened if the character had responded *this way* [insert a different scenario]
How do we respond in this same situation?
Questions like these [and others you come up with] will get your child thinking about options to the story rather than just listening to the words and moving on. Make this a conversation [and yes, this takes time out of your day but it is time invested not lost] and then, allow your child to answer, meaning don’t give your answer first but give value to their thoughts.
If I am reading the book as a collective group [with siblings] I am sure not to point out the one child I picked the book for. But as the book reading progresses, I can see a stir beginning in their hearts. Once finishing the book most of us scatter about our day and as the words sit with their hearts, it usually happens that that one child circles back with me and brings up how the words in the book spoke to them, and they can now see how their actions have affected those around them. It is a beautiful tool in helping them grow with the help of the Holy Spirit, instead of mom or dad being the ones who always point things out directly.
This takes intentionality as a parent, it takes us setting our phones down and watching our children. studying their actions and praying over their hearts. God has given us the opportunity to come alongside our children in their personal growth and help them develop the character of Christ.